I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize