I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
