Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
