after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
don't judge my taste in strippers
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
