I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize