What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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