I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
