you suck at this game today
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.