I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
