Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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