the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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