I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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