honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
We talked him into tasing himself.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
