Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Boobs are out for the taking
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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