problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
