I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
