am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
