My room smells like vodka and shame
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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