I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize