Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
