You're my little dorito
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
cat food counts as protein by the way
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
