I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
