Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
