There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
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