i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Randomize
