so that wasnt chicken after all
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
