is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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