everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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