You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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