Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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