What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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