Those balls look pretty dangerous.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
