If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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