I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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