ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Randomize
