To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
