I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
