Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
