If i come over, it means nothing
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
