either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
