whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I got her a Nickelback box set.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
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