We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
