Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
