i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Operation Purity has been aborted
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
