What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Last time i carry you out of a forest
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
