who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
