You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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