I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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