So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
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buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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