I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
You made out with two different species that night
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.â€
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.â€
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